…3…2…1…boom.
i’m so thankful finals is over. studying all day, all night. a lot of my grades r at 89% and one of my grade is 80%…if that shit drops down to a C+ ima shoot myself. no no, correction: my parents will. UGH. hate gahdamn spanish.
chores chores chores.
if i’m not hooping at logan/sc, i’m at home doing chores. ugh, when i try to rest, i just get in more trouble. they already think i don’t do any chores which is fucking stupid cuz i’m always helping around the house.
lost track of how many times they’ve called me a dissapointment.
i cannot wait till i get my license.
all i’ve been doing lately is daydream about my car and what it’ll be like once i’m able to get out on the road. my parents keep telling me not to be like my big sister, fucking shit up. this is her 8th year in college for a 4 year course. idk how many times i hafta tell them, i won’t be like her.when i get my license, i won’t have to feel so bad for asking my parents to drive me everywhere like hoop practice and visiting friends and to walmart/officemax and to the gym on late nights. i’ll still ask them for permission to get outta the house (most of the time haha) but i’m out, no more feeling so bad.
i enjoy driving to school everymorning with my big sister asleep in the front seat “being my safe, watching guardian”…not. i enjoy having the windows down, having the music down, just driving around.
once i’m pissed at home again (& a gym isn’t open), that’s definately what i’m gunna do.
speaking of being able to drive around…how could i forget to mention being able to visit my boyfriend at his house once in a while.
i mean, nothing’s gunna happen.
i just love being with him. just sitting, chilling there.
laying down in his arms, just relazing.
my parents don’t trust me enough to let me go to his house for even 5 min. </3.
i guess it’s reasonable, they just don’t want anything to happen.
just wished they trusted me a bit more…
the only way me and Babe hang out outside of school is if it’s at my house.
if we get lucky we get to watch a movie at UL, UC …then head back home. haha.
i love hanging out with him at home but they are sooo many people that live in my house. they r always walking around chilling downstairs and stuff.
no boys r allowed upstairs so no where we could really go.
not to mention my little booger of a sister always bugging us. |:
it’s one thing to want to play a game or 2 with us…
…but when she wants to be with us ALL THE TIME and acts like a little BRAT?!?!
nu-uh. not gunna happen.
then there’s fucking basketball.
i LOVE the sport. just sooo much pressure to always play well with this dumb ass rep and ish. :\ but what’s life without a little pressure, yunno? it’s wat pushes u to do better.
i just hate how much more stress it puts on me.
gotta step up my GAME.
i’ve been getting so many looks and offers and ish idk what to do.
ugh. more decisions to make. more pressure. more stress.
meeting different basketball coaches.
trying to be recruited for different teams.
asked to join track and field?! shit. spring is the only time i have a break away from school sports. |:
idk how to balance all this shit out.
fuck injuries.
fuck asthma.
fuck eczema.
“fuck bitches. get money. play basketball.”
hahah
and that’s just the start of all my thoughts…
…i need a break. but idk how to get one.
my head is really bouta explode from over thinking everything so damn much.
…3…2…1…boom. \:
